An open letter to my heroes…an explanation of the shirts I wore to the January 6th hearings and the days after.
An open letter to my heroes…an explanation of the shirts I wore to the January 6th hearings and the days after.
An open letter to my heroes…an explanation of the shirts I wore to the January 6th hearings and the days after.
Dear patron saints of my youth, the bands and people on the t-shirts I wore during my testimony to the Congressional Select Committee and on all the media appearances I have made since:
I didn’t have the foresight to anticipate the waves it would cause. I was a bit in survival mode. There is no how-to on how to navigate something like the January 6th hearings best. For many years I have been able to be anonymous after my time with the Oath Keepers. I have tried to make up for my time with the Oath Keepers. At first, working anonymously, But when I felt I needed to begin to put my name to it, it thrust me into the spotlight in ways I could not have imagined. I still have no real idea just how bright that spotlight will burn.
As I got deeper into things, I lost a good chunk of who I had been as a young artist and punk rock kid growing up along the front range of Colorado in the 80s and 90s.
When I drank the Kool-Aid, I began to dress differently, I began to speak differently, and I began to become someone that I no longer recognized. Until it became so much so that I recoiled in the shock of my reflection, this was the best thing that could have happened to me…as it shook the old me back awake.
As part of regaining the person I had lost, I wrapped myself in the music that has been such a healing salve in my past. This included my all-time favorite bands, as the world has seen me wearing this week. Including the Descendants, the Deftones, Nirvana, The Cure, and The Smiths (I don’t know if I need to include Morrisey in this or not…but out of fear that he is misunderstood, I will.) I also had a Keanu Reeves shirt (because the whole fucking world needs a little more Keanu right now.)
I did not in any way mean to cause these issues; I am trying to survive the shitstorm of the world, suddenly knowing who I am and my sins. I was wrapping myself up in those things that helped me heal and become more myself again. I also relied on the music that had been the soundtrack to my life before I became lost, listening to them as much as possible.
Like all of us, music has always been one of the best medicines for all the shit in life. And when facing the eyes of the world, I turned to them. I just wasn’t in a place to think about it all. I was in survival mode.
These shirts were the tangible icons of my heroes that helped me reclaim myself. (I am still a work in progress.)
PS – If you still don’t get this—fuck off!
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